Some things going on...

I wouldn't call it as 'it has been a while' phase. The last time I posted a blog post was June 30th, that wasn't a short period, at least for me, though through those time I went through quite of a helluva ride with life, but that's how life's supposed to be anyway.

     I have left Dengkil last year's April by the way. I barely remember anything about that place now except for some very good memories. For some fellow Dengkilians who read this might question whether I truly had my best time there if I barely remember anything; the answer is, yes, but that's how I keep myself moving on. Some things, some places, some people are fun to be with, to be played or to be enjoyed to the point when you have to separate yourself with them (by fate or by force) it breaks your heart, I know. But maybe, just maybe... because I'm so used to these kind of heartbreaking moments, it takes shorter time for me to move on. And if you haven't, that's fine. That's totally fine, even if it means it'd take you a decade long to move on, you got the time while you're still alive. Long as you don't make yourself stuck there mentally 'til it burdens you, then... that might mean you need some help skskksksk

      Life was good for the next few months then... Worked as a full timer in SGAMN (you figure it out yourself) with two of my best friends, Humairah and Fahim. Oh, I actually worked in CS first 2 weeks before I decided to join the f&b outlet. Those times were truly fun and amazing, memories made were unforgettable and now I have plenty of foreigner friends. Made me learn some life perspectives too. Had to leave in August because of degree admission in September. Re-joined SG team in the last week of September as a part-timer and I'm having quite a good time. Don't ask me how did I manage to balance a working and studying life, I basically failed in doing so for my first semester, besides all of the other circumstances that led me to that disastrous point. Basically, I costed my first semester result and damage has been done. And only now I am working to improve things since I am pretty convinced that my mental health is somewhat stable now.

     Fast forward to this new year, 2020, honestly, I didn't look forward to anything. At most, I wanted my life to be only this year long, but He had His plans better for me, and I could say that I'm pretty much recovering from suicidal and depressive phase of my life for almost 3 months now and I'm making plans for my future. It's not as easy as it sounds but hey, I'm learning and progressing and that's all that matters. Biggest shout out to the friends (there's plenty of names but some of them are worth mentioning; Amirah, Erina, Siti, Humairah, Zuhair, Fahim, Amy, Sara] who have always had my back since then. They're one of the major reasons I want to live and to do better in life. May Allah repays all of the kindness they had ever spent on me in any form.

     And with that, I think that's pretty much all is there for me to share (as of now). Ah yes, there's a pandemic going on at the moment but I truly don't know how to express my feelings other than all this makes me sad but of course, being sad alone wouldn't make anything any better. I just hope this pandemic would end sooner and a vaccine is able to be brought at least in the span of a year from now.

Signing off, Azwa.